Pre-Idol Parody Party
Ryan: Welcome to American Idol. It's country night here and we've got some good stuff for you tonight. I'm Ryan Seacrest. And this is Kellie Pickler singing Jesus Take The Wheel.
(Kellie sings... if you can call it that.)
Randy: Listen dawg. It's like this. Let me break it down for you. You know what I'm sayin'?
Ryan: No Randy, we don't. Miss Abdul?
Paula: You know what I love about you Kellie? Everything. I just want to shrink you down so that you'll fit in my hand and carry you everywhere with me. You're adorable.
Ryan: And that has *what* to do with her singing?
Simon: Kellie, if I can be honest, your personality is miles better than Carrie Underwood's, but your singing was not.
Kellie: But Sahmun, I thought I was your special friend.
Simon: Oh come on darling - I only told you that so that you'd sleep with me. There's nothing between us but bedsheets. Off you go.
Ryan: O...kay. I'm speechless folks. I am without speech. If you want to vote for Kellie Pickler please call 866-IDOLS-01. I'm getting too old for this shit.
posted by RealityCheck @ Tuesday, April 04, 2006
2 Comments:
Ryan: Up next, Paris Bennett singing "My Best Friend Ran Off With My Husband and I Miss Her."
Paris: Goo goo gah gah.
Randy: Yo dawg pound we got a hot one tonight!
Paris: Da da.
Paula: Paris, you know I just love you. I wish I could squeeze you into my womb and give birth to you. Everytime I hit this peyote, I dream of you on a cloud of rainbows.
Paris: Ma ma.
Simon: Paris, if I'm being honest, that was a bit sophomoric. It was like being in a nursery full of retarded babies and they're all crying out of tune. Appalling.
Paris: Mine! Mine!
Ryan: If you want to vote for Paris, dial 1 866 IDOLS 02. (sticks bottle in Paris' mouth.)
Now THAT was hilarious. I laughed out loud and I don't do that often. Good one dude.
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