LORD OF THE IDOLS

No, this is not a Mandisa spoof. If I were going to do that I'd use Tommy if I were going to use any movie. :)

Welcome once again to my opinioncap. This is a special one though as it is my Lord of The Rings edition. I did love the trilogy rather much so what better way to pay tribute than to assign the "cast" of Idol with characters from the story.

First up tonight was Samwise Bucky. I say the same thing that I always do. You can only compare a Bucky performance to another Bucky performance. There is no putting it side by side with another contestant's. This one - I thought was pretty good. FOR BUCKY. I'm not like downloading Morpheus so that I can put that performance on CD, but it was watchable. The only problem Bucky truly has is that he will never be Mr. Frodo. He doesn't possess The One Ring. He never will. Bucky can get the boot any given week.

Second in line was Legolace the Archer. Why compare Ace to a fancy, nancy elf? Because Ace is pretty, oh so pretty, he is pretty and witty and... Okay I'll play nice and not finish that lyric. :) I found the video clip of Queen's refusal to Backstreet-ize their song funny. Honestly he might as well have because his performance was, well, laughable. I don't know what Ace was thinking as Queen ballads to exist that would have suited him fine. Furthermore, I don't know what Paula (aka Shelob the Spider) was thinking saying Ace didn't screw up the song. Ace - she just wants to mate with you!!! This may be the last we see of Ace.

Following Ace was Kellie Pickler. Today I'm changing her name to Kellum. We wants it. We wants the precioussss. Yeah, she wants it but after this show she put on she ain't gonna get it. Granted, it was better than I thought it would be. It could have been much worse. However, it still sucked. If you want to compare it to a performance - this was not AT ALL even close to when Carrie Underwood rocked it out with 'Alone' and brought down the house. Kellie looked like a cheap stripper that sings, but doesn't take her clothes off. She should be in bottom 3, but won't because the Dark Lord Simon favors her so.

The next victim was the would be King Chris. Chris is virtually bulletproof right now. I will admit as a Chris fan that none of his performances since have been as good as 'Hemmorage'. Damn he should have quit and joined Fuel when he had the chance. However, some people have to understand that the bands that make the type of records Chris will make ALL sound like that. They scream. They're not pitch perfect singers. That's the style. I really disliked this song more than anything though. He would have done so much better with Bohemian. I'm crossing my fingers for next week.

Next we had the elven princess Katharine. She must have eaten some bad fruit or something because although I enjoyed the performance as a whole, technically she wasn't perfect. I've heard much better from her. I'm sure she won't be in danger though since Ace sucked balls.

Now the man of the hour, Mr. Elliott Baggins. You see, Elliott HAS the One Ring, but Lord Simon wants to throw him in the fire pits and give the ring to Kellum. I don't want to see that happen. Elliott was awesome and I felt the best of the night. That should be enough to keep him safe. Besides, Samwise Bucky is the sidekick so he should get sacrificed first.

Taylor the Gray is back!! I had to laugh at his attempt to kick down the mic stand. I would have laughed even harder if he had trippped over it later, but I love Taylor. He is at his best when he has that energy going. And he did this MILES better than David Radford did. The man should realize what he's good at and what people want to see and give it to us. No more John Denver!!

Finally we get to the pimp spot. Now how did the Lollipop Guild wind up in Middle Earth? Paris has the Kimberly Locke hair going tonight. I decided who she reminds me of. A more talented Diana DeGarmo. There are a lot of similarities. Paris did alright with this song. It's obvious she has a powerful voice, but I wasn't wowed by the performance. I've seen much better. Should be enough to save her though.

What is with this season? They have the talent. This isn't like Season 3 where the only two people I found to be better than karaoke were LaToya and Fantasia. It all comes down to frickin poor song choices. *sigh*

If I had the choice - Ace, Kellie and Bucky would be bottom 3 but I have a feeling it WILL be

Ace, Elliott and Bucky. Elliott gets no love.