Dr. Doom Has Crushed My Beating Heart...

This Idol recap is going to sound slightly odd mainly because its the first one I've written in which I know who got the boot already. Not happy. So very much unhappy. On with the recap before I start breathing fire or something.

I had to come up with a new movie theme this week and since there were only four contestants remaining the most logical film that came to mind was The Fantastic Four. And they are all fantastic because I picked all of them to come this far. Apparently America and I share similar tastes. (Except for this week.. GRRRRRR)

The first performer was "The Thing" Taylor Hicks. Can't you picture Taylor coming out and saying 'its clobberin time'. I totally can. I honestly figured that this theme would suit Taylor very well and it did. His first song was Jailhouse Rock which honestly isn't my favorite Elvis song. It was a classic Taylor performance though, natch. Plenty of energy, but it wasn't the best vocal I've ever heard. Simon's bashing was unwarranted however. It was not a horrible Elvis impersonation. Taylor does those things ALL THE TIME.

T-Dawg came back stronger though with his second song In The Ghetto. I thought it was just awesome. Taylor's not as fun when he's not bouncing around like a monkey on a sugar high, but I can appreciate a good voice. Seriously though, I can't help but picture Eric Cartman from South Park every time I hear this song. Some associations can not be broken.

So next... *breaks out into uncontrollable tears* 'Its not fair dammit! Why, God, why? How could you take him from me? Its not faaaaaaaaiiiiiir.' Alright - now that I got that out. Chris was the next to perform. Chris is of course Johnny Storm - hot, young, smokin'... yep that's him. Flame on! (This is especially funny since Chris Evans plays the character in the movie) Chris' first song was Suspicious Minds. Probably my personal favorite Elvis song. I thought it was really good. Anyone who didn't was smoking crack. I'll bet Simon felt really bad about being indifferent about the performance when Chris got eliminated. The second song he chose to do was A Little Less Conversation. As a Chris fan I am ashamed to say that up until the end of the song, I agreed with Nigel that Jon Peter Lewis did a better job on this song. Go on. Throw things at me.

But Chris will still be a star even if I have to wait until his album comes out. So no worries. But the show will not be the same now.

Third up was Elliott Yamin - Mr. Fantastic. El really fits that role. His vocals lead the pack, but everyone else seems to get more attention than he does. Poor Elliott just works his butt off every week to make us like him and I do -- I really, really like him. In A Dream was a song that I actually didn't know. He would have blown me away either way. He really might be the best male vocalist ever on AI. Maybe. When I heard El would be singing Trouble I didn't know how to feel because Carrie Underwood sang it last year and did a heck of a job with it. You know what though? He made it his own and it was HOT. Because they took my Chris away, I am 100% backing Elliott. Consider me one of the Yaminions.

Last but should have been least - okay, I didn't really mean that. Not that Kat is a bad singer by any means, but she deserved to go. I'm trying not to be bitter. It really wasn't her fault. The Invisible Woman pulled out all the stops to stay in the game. Actually on her first little medley song she forgot some words and on 'Cant Help Falling In Love' she went flat in places but gosh darnit she tried. I can't help but think that after that wardrobe malfunction every Maxim subscriber in America was putting their hands to better use and voting like mad for Kat. You never know when these malfunctions will happen or how often. I just keep grasping for reasons why this awful thing happened as you can see.

Well no more. I'm on the El Train now.