Crikey! Frats Rule!

I can't tell you how delighted I was to learn that this leg of the Race would take place in Australia. I have never been to Australia, nor have I ever been out of the country, but if I could pick any one country to go to outside of the United States - it would be there. Beaches... hot accents... Keith Urban... I mean, what else could you possibly need?

The Philanator!! And who bolted over to Phil and stepped onto the mat in first place?

TEAM SPEEDO
Who's the biotch now? I knew with every ounce of my being that you guys were going to bounce back and finish strong this leg. Catching that first ferry helped you immensely and now you have enough vacations to hold ya over for a couple years. And how sweet was it that y'all beat MoJo in a foot race? Guess we know who will win that battle if it ever comes down to that again. I must admit I was a little worried when Jeremy couldn't find the tunnels. It cost you time, but good thinking Jer telling Joseph to go the canoe route after you didn't see any clues in there. He ended up finding one, but it was still smart.

TEAM MEAN MACHINE
I can't figure out where things suddenly went sour with Joseph and Monica. Ever since that fish incident it's been nothing but negative vibes. I guess when you're that close to money it can make your heart a few sizes too small. Honestly, I have no problem with misleading teams or things like that to further yourself. I was a huge fan of the Boston Rob strategy. However, to openly hate on another team when it appears that they're nothing but nice to everyone is something I can't understand. Maybe there's something behind the scenes that I don't know about. And Joseph really needs to work on his deception skills. If you're going to lie to another team - don't make it THAT obvious because then you just look like an asshole. AND I'm not even going to start on Monica and "I'm scared of him!" I hate to see her with the alligators next week. And what was that comment about the Hippies being followers or something? Apparently blondie must have been looking in a mirror when she said that.

TEAM REBOUND
Kudos to BJ and Tyler. I knew they would have no problem getting enough money to get them back in the game. They're one of the most likeable teams EVER. The hippies are a force to be reckoned with and now that they're not at a disadvantage everyone else had better watch out. Locals are very likely to help them, they're well traveled and smart, plus they're not afraid to do anything. The likeability is probably the most dangerous element. Hell - they got two other teams to give them money at a time when the Race is in dog eat dog mode. And they did deserve the IOU from the Frats in return for the 'sign up sheet' incident. Can't wait to see if there is in fact a Yield next week and who will get yielded. Something tells me it will be MoJo or the Hippies. I'm hoping the former. It would be well deserved.

TEAM BEHIND
I don't call them that just because they have nice ones. They just always seem to be in the game, but behind the pack. Good just hustling this leg though and I was glad to see a lack of arguments. Of course, because there is generally no drama with Ray and Yolanda, they're kind of boring on TV which is why I don't want them to win. No offense guys. They're both in amazing shape and you'd think they'd excel at this since it requires so much endurance, but it's the travel aspect that kills them. Maybe if they stay on one continent for long enough they'll make up some ground but otherwise, they'll be the next casualty. Doesn't it seem to anyone like they don't want this as much as other teams? I don't know. That's just how they come off.

TEAM NOTEBOOK
You'd have to see the movie The Notebook to know what that was reference to. I knew it was only a matter of time before the teams dwindled down so far that 4th or 5th place wasn't going to cut it for Fran and Barry. Hey - at least they got to taste victory on the last leg which is something no other team has gotten to do with the Hippies and the Frats around so props to them. They had the lead and a couple of physical tasks did them in. They have got to be proud of themselves for getting to that point although I'm sure they really wanted to stay in the game. Alas, it wasn't meant to be.

Next week is going to be fun. The Battle Royale. MoJo vs. Hippies. Scheduled for one fall. Only one team will win. And that team will be... Eric and Jeremy. He who lets himself be distracted gets snowed by the REAL competition.

Attention: Commissioner Gordon

I'm in a superhero kind of mood. You see, I am originally from Ohio and used to frequent Cleveland quite a bit. At this current moment, Spiderman 3 is being filmed there. I'm something of a dork so I'm quite excited. It's not like it's Weekend At Bernie's. It's SPIDERMAN 3. Huge frickin' deal. Anyhoo, on with American Idol stuff.

I ran through all sorts of movies to come up with one to spoof with this Top 6. This week's movie will be the Batman series. There's only room for one star in Gotham City. Who will it be?

Perhaps Katwoman. Might I say that Kat looked absolutely unbelievable last night. Then again she always does except for the week she looked like a reject backup dancer for Preggie Spears. I didn't care for that look in particular. Kat took on a Whitney Houston song. I seriously do want to hit the judges in the head because yes it is difficult to get the original version of a song out of your head, but to compare Kat to Whitney in the first place isn't fair. They have two different styles. In fact, the only person I've ever heard hold up to Whitney on one of her power ballads is one of Clay Aiken's backup singers. She sang 'I Will Always Love You' and it was every bit just as good as Whitney in her prime. Kat's performance wasn't GREAT to be honest, but it deserved a lot more credit than the judges gave. Mean de-pimping!

Singing second was The Riddler - Elliott Yamin. He's a riddle because I can't understand why it took some people this long to recognize how truly good he is. It even took Elliott himself a long time as his confidence has finally showed up the last couple of weeks. This was his best performance and one of the best PERIOD of this season. And seriously what was up with Paula crying? Is she trying to make it obvious that she's wasted or what? I guess if it makes for good TV it's okay. Big props to E-Dawg and I am sure this performance is enough to keep him in the game this week.

Oh, great. It's time for little miss Poison Ivy Pickler. And the question on the minds of all Americans.... what will Kellie do tonight to make herself look like an idiot? I know - sing 'Unchained Melody'. The second I heard she would be performing this song I knew she had to be insane. It's Simon Cowell's favorite song and one of the greatest songs of all time. Period. I suppose this will really test her fan base's loyalty. First, she starts the song in the middle which comes off terrible to me, but I guess that was the arrangement and not her. It just all goes downhill from there. Again, she knew she made a boo boo. If Kellie thinks she did bad - others should take that as a hint. It's clear at this point that she is outmatched vocally. Like Poison Ivy, the songs she's touched lately have withered. Everyone loved Old Yeller, but it was really for the best. Don't dial. You'll thank yourself for it later.

Next up was Paris Bennett aka Batgirl. Damn. I gave away her secret identity. She's a good singer - that's obvious. She just has a lot of actual maturing to do as opposed to the maturity she shows in her performances. And what better way to break from that mold then singing the love theme for senior citizens everywhere - 'The Way We Were'. Paris's vocals weren't bad, but the song choice was my problem. As it has been so many times this season. Granted, I loved Paris last week and she sang an older style song, but it was a jazzy song so she was able to inject some youthfulness into it. This week was just... it didn't do anything for me. Therefore, I think Paris may be in some trouble.

Taylor 'The Joker' would not seem to specialize in love songs. He's always done best with the upbeat stuff because he can run around the stage like his pants are on fire and everyone goes crazy. He really should have gone with "You Are So Beautiful". Taylor singing smooth, soulful R & B didn't work for me in spots. When Taylor sings hard and really gets into it - magic. When he tried to sing those low notes I just wasn't hearing it and that is when it sounded karaokeish. However, I don't think Taylor is in any kind of trouble because the Soul Patrol is even more rabid than the Pickler Pack and would vote for Taylor even if he sang 'I Kissed A Girl'. I'm not THAT loyal.

And finally the man of the hour... the Chosen One... it... is... Dananananananana DAUGHTRY!! Christopher sang 'Have You Ever Really Loved A Woman'. Good call. Not only did he sing it well, but a song like that is going to cause every woman who watches the show to dial for him until their fingers bleed. He knows how to work that hottie angle. The judges didn't OVER praise him in the manner that they did Katharine last week so I was glad to see that. Nothing more you can say. Except Batman's wife isn't going to appreciate the piles of panties that Chris receives in the mail after this performance. That's what you get for marrying the hottest man in the known WORLD. Sorry. Just had to use a Randy Jackson catchphrase.

We'll see all 3 ladies in the Bottom 3 tonight, except a possible trade of Katharine for Elliott.

Pickler should go home if there is any justice in the world, but it will likely be Paris. The doctor has spoken.

Like Sands Through The Hourglass...

It never fails that in every season of the Race there is an episode where my favorite teams do poorly and it is usually towards the end because the teams I like are always the ones who kick ass. I was just generally very unhappy after all of this. Next week can't be much worse.

TEAM LUCKY
Yes. Fran and Barry are freakin lucky. I know I'm cruel and don't give them much credit, but its hard to. I give them all the props in the world for being able to do this at their age, but teams like Fran and Barry last longer because of a combination of luck and other teams' mistakes. BJ and Tyler helped them up until the Roadblock, then they followed MoJo until MoJo got lost. I give Fran credit for being able to read a map. Other than that, they're alright. Just not my preferred source of entertainment.

TEAM NOT AS LUCKY
MoJo is still fueled by a good deal of luck. Luck was not on their side at the Detour, however it was at the Roadblock. One could say they have an off again on again relationship with it. Of course, the fact that they haven't always been the brightest bling in the jewelry shop prevented them from first place, but they still did well for themselves. I have a feeling this may not be long lasting luck, but MoJo can enjoy it for the time being.

TEAM POTTY MOUTHS
Don't cuss at me! Don't you cuss at me Ray! Sorry. I was having a moment. Look who has improved their position. They fell behind but made up ground after the misfortune of other teams. Ray and Yolanda really have to count on that because often they do seem out of their element. If many physical detours and roadblocks lie ahead they can at least be certain they'll beat out Fran and Barry.

TEAM MISDIRECTION
Guys - don't scare me like that again. Here's the thing about taking risks. Okay, so the camel thing wasn't a risk - you just got lost as hell. However, the stunt after the Roadblock.. The number one rule of the Race except for in the final leg - You don't have to finish first. Just make sure you're not last. You weren't last, but you lost a lot of time. I'm not too worried. Your biggest competition is behind you. I still believe in a frat win.

TEAM MISFORTUNE
This was the first time I saw real anger and frustration from the hippies. It was actually good because it humanized them rather than just seeming like characters. Everything has just gone wrong for them the last couple of legs. I don't think being stripped of their money and possessions is going to hurt them, so I'm not worried. These people in all of these countries really take to them. It's pretty crazy. But you can expect them to bust out some major strategies from this point on. Seriously, I'd beware.

Oh and on a final note, these teams cannot fault Eric and Jeremy for being shady because all of them have done something shady at some point or another. It's A MILLION DOLLARS people. Besides, did you expect them to park their butts behind y'all and wait for you to cross the flood waters since nobody wanted to go first? Sheesh. I'm out.

The Idol Of Oz

I've decided centering my Idol opinioncaps around movies is going to be a recurring thing. It breaks the monotony and makes it so easy to poke fun at people who annoy me. The movie of the week is The Wizard Of Oz. It fit with the theme since I would consider that movie as an old standard plus Paris is already a member of the Lollipop Guild. It works!

Oh and JD - sorry buddy but I don't think we're on the same wavelength with the performances. JUST about everyone brought it tonight. I shall explain. (Thanks for the precious reference by the way.)

Ryan Seacrest aka ToTo mourns the loss of Bucky Covington. Awwwwwww. The audience does not appear to be that upset. I hope Bucky isn't watching this.

The first to perform will be Tin Man Chris Daughtry. If someone would just hand him his oil can he wouldn't shout so much. Does no one have enough decency to help a guy out? Well, Rod Stewart does because tonight Chris is singing the Louis Armstrong classic 'What A Wonderful World'. I was truly a bit worried because this is a low key song and Mr. Daughtry is not a low key singer. He pulled it off though. It was one of his better performances, I thought. It was very much out of his element and he still did what he had to do.

It's Lollipop Guild time! FYI Paris - munchkins do not wear suits. Dimerits to the stylists. Boo! It's a good thing this little lady's speaking voice is not like her singing voice. My head might explode. Paris' performance tonight was WOW. It was her best to date in my opinion. I knew that standards would be her thing because her voice is along the same lines of singers like Billie Holliday. Very reminiscent of that era. There's really nothing more I can say about that performance. Solid.

Next up, the man who could be another Lincoln if he only had a brain, the Scarecrow Taylor. They both like to dance around. The comparison is a no-brainer. HA! I thought the mention of the Saturday Night Live skit was humorous. Of course, I've seen many impressions of Taylor so it was bound to happen. The silver fox managed to keep it toned down (for him) throughout the performance. It was another home run. Classic Taylor is GOOD Taylor. When his stuffing starts falling out and he gets lit on fire - he's not good. Last night, he kept it together.

If he only had the nerve. That's what all of us fans of the Cowardly Elliott have been saying. If he could get his confidence up and perform as well as he sings - he would be da bomb. Last night, Elliott gave a grrrrruff and a grrrrruff and he brought it home. The boy must have borrowed Paula's cup or something because he was on. Simon was ON something for saying the personality was lacking. Mr. Cowell, the personality finally came through. I guess the only good that can come of this is that the Melissa effect happens and Yamin fans vote like rabid wolves thinking he is in danger. That is my hope.

It is time for Kellie and her ruby red slippers since she thinks shoes are so great. Get cheaper haircuts Kel and you can afford more shoes. I won't even comment on what she said about a load off her chest. That was just wrong. You know, I really don't even have to make up my own comments on her performance. She said it all. Kellie butchered it. The Wizard didn't have anything for her. Now she can just click her heels together, go back to Albemarle and recall her journey in Oz. She can tell the gas station manager, the garbageman and her friends at the Wild Cherry I saw you and you and you there. Will someone just drop a house on her please?

Ace, Ace baby. Vanilla Ace, Ace baby. Sorry. Couldn't resist. Pay no attention to the man in the closet - I am the great and powerful Ace! Ace looks like an investment banker tonight. Or a Chippendale. I was waiting for tearaway pants or something. I'm hiring him for the next Bachelorette party I go to! He actually did alright tonight. I say alright because in comparison to everyone else (minus Kellie) he wasn't as good. Ace gets to be my sheep tonight. Since they'll never get rid of Pickler even if she comes on stage and mimes the song, someone has to go and Mr. Young is the low man on my totem pole. Sorry dawg.

McPheeeeeeeever. It's Kat the Good Witch. Rod Stewart loves her and her assets. Who doesn't? This is the perfect style for Kat and it showed because she knocked one out of the park. And also may I say she looked stunning last night. I think Simon went a wee bit overboard on the compliments because she was not miles above the rest. I guess he's found a new pony to ride. At any rate, Kat should have guaranteed herself to not be in the bottom three after that.

I have no idea what to predict. As far as who my bottom 3 were based on vocals/performance - Kellie, Ace and surprisingly Chris (if I have to pick one amongst the rest).

However, I believe that it WILL be Ace, Elliott and Paris. I am triple crossing my fingers that Ace goes home. Or Kellie if I win the lottery of Idol. That would be some kind of early birthday present.

Toga! Toga!

Okay so I was a little bummed this episode. Not that Lake and Michelle are gone - heavens no! There wasn't a whole lot of screen time for the frats. Thus, I was less entertained than usual. It's okay though cause they're totally going to win.

One may ask why I sometimes change the nicknames I give to the teams from one week to the next. If the mood strikes me, I just do. One nickname may be more fitting one week than another. Or I just get bored. Adult ADD really sucks.

TEAM DA VINCI - So Eric and Jeremy really have nothing to do with Leonardo other than the fact that they're going to the Da Vinci Code premiere in like a month. Team Alpha was old though so it was the best I could come up with at the time. Was a little shocked they went for the Fast Forward. That's something you tend to use when you know you need it and it was a risk, but we'll see how it pays off. And wouldn't you know these were Roadblocks and Detours I think they could have done EASILY. Oh well, they're in first again. And that's all that really matters in the end.

TEAM MELLOW - The reason Ray and Yolanda have done well up until this point was because they've stayed calm under pressure and they're strong. The reason they have not done well is that they're not the best with directions in general. And they get off trains that they're not supposed to get off of. It was probably Lake's idea. Poor saps. Of course, next week looks like Mr. Negativity left some of his bad mojo (no pun intended) behind and Ray gets bitten by the angry monster. This could cause that team to implode because cool headedness has been their advantage. Again, it works for MoJo so apparently it isn't always the kiss of death.

TEAM BROKEN OX - On a whole this week, MoJo was on good behavior. The Detour and Roadblock mostly went without incident. Of course, there was the little Fast Forward issue. It was smart of them to go for it, but shit happens. Monica didn't spazz out and start breaking plates over her head mumbling about fish guts. They simply moved on and did what they had to do. I actually worry about them as competition. Not the brightest bulbs in the lamp store, but they get it done somehow.

TEAM GOLDEN - You know I'll bet Barry considered just pushing Fran off that ledge when she didn't want to jump. Maybe a little. I would have. This is another team that screws up, but just gets it done. One thing they do well is they know what they can and can't do. They knew that Herculean effort wasn't their thing so they immediately went to unscramble letters. I know I said before that if the teams all got grouped together, Fran and Barry might falter. They did - a little, but they're in the same spot they have been for the last couple of legs. That works for now, but eventually fourth place is going to equal last place and don't expect those hippies to stay down for long.

TEAM DEADHEAD - I never honestly thought I would witness the hippies making a mistake of this magnitude. They've been just about perfect so far and their excellent sense of direction has been a strong point until now. I am glad though that even despite the setback they were able to have fun doing the Detour. And they were honestly pertrified when Phil told them about the penalty. Maybe this will motivate them. Or maybe not from what we see in the previews next week. The only good that can come of BJ and Tyler being eliminated would be the end of the frat boys' biggest competition. Otherwise, it would be a loss. Their entertainment value is insane.

TEAM LAKE - Okay, so Lake called his wife a bitch on national television. He has officially crossed the Jonathan Baker line. Thank God he is gone before he has the opportunity to cross it further. Now, I'm really not saying Lake is a bad person because I understand editing. However, I hope seeing himself on television has opened his eyes to his behavior. One bickering couple down. One to go. Possibly two.

Can someone tell me when there is going to be a frickin' non-elimination? Geez.

LORD OF THE IDOLS

No, this is not a Mandisa spoof. If I were going to do that I'd use Tommy if I were going to use any movie. :)

Welcome once again to my opinioncap. This is a special one though as it is my Lord of The Rings edition. I did love the trilogy rather much so what better way to pay tribute than to assign the "cast" of Idol with characters from the story.

First up tonight was Samwise Bucky. I say the same thing that I always do. You can only compare a Bucky performance to another Bucky performance. There is no putting it side by side with another contestant's. This one - I thought was pretty good. FOR BUCKY. I'm not like downloading Morpheus so that I can put that performance on CD, but it was watchable. The only problem Bucky truly has is that he will never be Mr. Frodo. He doesn't possess The One Ring. He never will. Bucky can get the boot any given week.

Second in line was Legolace the Archer. Why compare Ace to a fancy, nancy elf? Because Ace is pretty, oh so pretty, he is pretty and witty and... Okay I'll play nice and not finish that lyric. :) I found the video clip of Queen's refusal to Backstreet-ize their song funny. Honestly he might as well have because his performance was, well, laughable. I don't know what Ace was thinking as Queen ballads to exist that would have suited him fine. Furthermore, I don't know what Paula (aka Shelob the Spider) was thinking saying Ace didn't screw up the song. Ace - she just wants to mate with you!!! This may be the last we see of Ace.

Following Ace was Kellie Pickler. Today I'm changing her name to Kellum. We wants it. We wants the precioussss. Yeah, she wants it but after this show she put on she ain't gonna get it. Granted, it was better than I thought it would be. It could have been much worse. However, it still sucked. If you want to compare it to a performance - this was not AT ALL even close to when Carrie Underwood rocked it out with 'Alone' and brought down the house. Kellie looked like a cheap stripper that sings, but doesn't take her clothes off. She should be in bottom 3, but won't because the Dark Lord Simon favors her so.

The next victim was the would be King Chris. Chris is virtually bulletproof right now. I will admit as a Chris fan that none of his performances since have been as good as 'Hemmorage'. Damn he should have quit and joined Fuel when he had the chance. However, some people have to understand that the bands that make the type of records Chris will make ALL sound like that. They scream. They're not pitch perfect singers. That's the style. I really disliked this song more than anything though. He would have done so much better with Bohemian. I'm crossing my fingers for next week.

Next we had the elven princess Katharine. She must have eaten some bad fruit or something because although I enjoyed the performance as a whole, technically she wasn't perfect. I've heard much better from her. I'm sure she won't be in danger though since Ace sucked balls.

Now the man of the hour, Mr. Elliott Baggins. You see, Elliott HAS the One Ring, but Lord Simon wants to throw him in the fire pits and give the ring to Kellum. I don't want to see that happen. Elliott was awesome and I felt the best of the night. That should be enough to keep him safe. Besides, Samwise Bucky is the sidekick so he should get sacrificed first.

Taylor the Gray is back!! I had to laugh at his attempt to kick down the mic stand. I would have laughed even harder if he had trippped over it later, but I love Taylor. He is at his best when he has that energy going. And he did this MILES better than David Radford did. The man should realize what he's good at and what people want to see and give it to us. No more John Denver!!

Finally we get to the pimp spot. Now how did the Lollipop Guild wind up in Middle Earth? Paris has the Kimberly Locke hair going tonight. I decided who she reminds me of. A more talented Diana DeGarmo. There are a lot of similarities. Paris did alright with this song. It's obvious she has a powerful voice, but I wasn't wowed by the performance. I've seen much better. Should be enough to save her though.

What is with this season? They have the talent. This isn't like Season 3 where the only two people I found to be better than karaoke were LaToya and Fantasia. It all comes down to frickin poor song choices. *sigh*

If I had the choice - Ace, Kellie and Bucky would be bottom 3 but I have a feeling it WILL be

Ace, Elliott and Bucky. Elliott gets no love.

Gentlemen Start Your Engines

The Amazing Race is back on a new night. I was really not crazy about the move because I had my whole television viewing schedule planned out. 8:00 on Wednesday nights had a reservation for Bones on Fox. My apologies to David Boreanaz, but I can't ignore the best season of the Race ever. Luckily I had a VCR and a DVD recorder. Guess which show got the special treatment? Only the best for my frat boys.

Speaking of which....

TEAM ALPHA - Apparently those Woodstock boys underestimated your smartness. It was dead even and you took the initiative to screw them over and get a comfortable lead. Not as comfortable as you or I would like, but we'll take it. Now you can focus on the million bucks instead of hot babes. Would you have really wanted Dani and Danielle if they were covered in fish slime anyways? They'll look a lot better after the Race is over and you boys will look a lot better with money in your pockets.

TEAM WOODSTOCK - BJ and Tyler are fun to watch 100% of the time. They ARE smart and well traveled and that will continue to be an advantage for them. I think the only edge Eric and Jeremy have over them is that the frat boys have no problem saying 'screw you'. The hippies are generally happy go lucky, although they do have tricks up their sleeves. That sign in sheet was about the funniest thing ever. I think there are some teams and I won't say who - that would have bought that hook, line and sinker. It was worth a try.

TEAM BREAKDOWN - MoJo have officially crossed the 'My Ox Is Broken' line. Please refer to Colin and Christie if you don't know what that means. It took them a long time to complete that Detour for two reasons. One being that they completely butchered that fish man's name. Somehow none of the other teams had a problem with it. Secondly, they panicked. Actually I should say Monica got frustrated which got Joseph frustrated which nearly caused a disaster. It happened with Flo and Zach. It happened with Colin and Christie. It happened with Hayden and Aaron. All of whom went far into the Race, so maybe it is actually a strategy. A fucked up one. But it works.

TEAM AARP - This is actually the first I've seen Barry get mad. I thought it was impossible. Apparently not. I'd hire a new map reader if I were him! Oh, right. This little snafu didn't really hurt them as they were in fourth place on the last leg. It didn't help them either though. They could have potentially slid past MoJo. I have to hand it to them. They're a solid team. BUT this leg didn't make for a lot of even ground for all of the teams as many other legs do. If everyone gets grouped together, the slower older couple may find themselves in trouble. Especially next week as Fran gets the willies about bungee.

TEAM LAKE - Seriously Lake, have a little more confidence in your woman and you might avoid a lot of stress. I truly believe that if Lake could chill, for like, 2 seconds that they might be a lot further ahead than they are. I read something someone wrote about this team being in trouble when Michelle has to start doing Roadblocks. We got a little sample of that in this episode. Lake has to realize also that screaming at Michelle while she is doing this will not get it done any faster. Trust me. I can vouch.

TEAM BUFF - Ray and Yolanda are still beautiful to look at. Even with fish guts. The thing that they did well on this leg was communicate and stay calm. That kept them from finishing last in this leg. If they keep doing this, it will be to their advantage because they're already strong. Physically they can keep up with any team. If they keep their composure, they can pass up teams like MoJo and Lake who have a tendency to get frustrated. They may not be as interesting as the hippies, but they're still a team to root for.

TEAM JEDI - Nooooooooooooooooo!! Honestly, I thought for sure this was a non-elimination leg. It usually happens by now, so I wasn't worried seeing Lori and Dave walk up to the mat in last place. Alas, they're gone. I can't say it was unfair. Two legs in a row they got into a confusing situation and panicked losing valuable time. It's something you can't do if you expect to win. I think they're adorable and I hope they go home, get married, start a family. I'm not too upset because I never did think they had the competitive edge to go all the way, but I would have liked to see them stick around a couple more legs.

Next week - the teams travel to Greece. All of the challenges shown in the previews from the Greek games to the bungee should favor the front runners - Eric/Jeremy and BJ/Tyler which is super since they're my two favorite teams!

More Race commentary will be coming your way then.

Pre-Idol Parody Party

Ryan: Welcome to American Idol. It's country night here and we've got some good stuff for you tonight. I'm Ryan Seacrest. And this is Kellie Pickler singing Jesus Take The Wheel.

(Kellie sings... if you can call it that.)

Randy: Listen dawg. It's like this. Let me break it down for you. You know what I'm sayin'?

Ryan: No Randy, we don't. Miss Abdul?

Paula: You know what I love about you Kellie? Everything. I just want to shrink you down so that you'll fit in my hand and carry you everywhere with me. You're adorable.

Ryan: And that has *what* to do with her singing?

Simon: Kellie, if I can be honest, your personality is miles better than Carrie Underwood's, but your singing was not.

Kellie: But Sahmun, I thought I was your special friend.

Simon: Oh come on darling - I only told you that so that you'd sleep with me. There's nothing between us but bedsheets. Off you go.

Ryan: O...kay. I'm speechless folks. I am without speech. If you want to vote for Kellie Pickler please call 866-IDOLS-01. I'm getting too old for this shit.